How you can safely help your friends, family out of an abusive relationship
HOUSTON - The Harris County Sheriff’s Office is still searching for the man accused of killing a woman and her dog in Spring Saturday morning. They say Dmitri Humphrey allegedly shot the woman after she tried to help her friend leave an alleged abusive relationship.
It highlights the lack of resources available to the friends and family of these victims who just want to help.
"We’re trying to help the survivors so much that sometimes we forget that there’s other people that are trying to help as well," said Amy Smith with the Harris County Domestic Violence Coordinating Council.
Safety is paramount.
A University of Houston study revealed there were 64 domestic violence homicides in Houston and Harris County in 2022, which is double compared to 2019.
"When you leave is the most dangerous time, because obviously the abuser is losing control, and that’s when a lot of homicides occur is when the relationship is ending," Smith said.
She adds developing a safety plan with your friend or family member should happen first while taking into account the abuser's history and whether they have access to a gun.
Smith recommends finding a time when they’re not home to leave and meeting up elsewhere, adding, "It might not necessarily be your house or your apartment, but it could be, let’s go to a neutral location, let’s go where there's going to be some people around where I’m not going to be alone."
Meeting at a police substation is a good option. If you still need guidance, there’s also the domestic violence hotline, which is not solely limited to victims.
Smith says you could, "Ask them, hey, I know I keep hearing things about a safety plan. What does that entail? I’m trying to get my friend out of a situation. What can I do to help them, and how can I help them do that? What’s the best way to go about doing that?"
But she adds this story should not deter you from stepping up to help. "Just use this as a cautionary tale to think about your safety and your friends safety before you go into a situation," said Smith.
If you need assistance reach out to the Houston Area Women’s Center Domestic Violence Hotline at (713) 528-2121.