Making a good marriage great & taking 'me time'
Hi Mary Jo,
What are ways that a good marriage can become great?
Crystal
Crystal,
These are the fantastic five I assign clients who are working on creating the best marriage they can. It is important to remember that practicing these actions every day is key.
- Communicate appreciation for your partner.
- Engage in intimacy both inside and outside the bedroom, and take turns initiating intimacy.
- Be responsible with and accountable for your finances. Financial discussions and planning are not optional – they’re mandatory.
- Do activities together and take time away with each other without the kids.
- Prioritize your marriage over your kids and career, including interests that sabotage your attention. This does not mean that you must spend all your time with each other; it means first asking, “Is this good for my marriage?”
Remember that couples who cooperate and brainstorm solutions together feel more valued and connected then those who don’t.
Hi Mary Jo,
How do I balance having my time and time for my partner without feeling guilty?
Sasha
Sasha,
The best way to avoid feeling guilty about taking “me time” is to remind yourself that alone time improves your emotional health, which directly impacts your relationship. Resentment and conflict often arise when someone feels like they give everything to someone else without getting to take care of themselves. Taking personal time promotes self-understanding and compassion for yourself and your partner. It is not a luxury – it is a necessity. Please, take time for you and talk about it with your partner so you both have time away for personal growth. It will enhance your relationship.